No Comparisons Please!

I had a most interesting conversation with someone this week.  A friend’s husband hugged me, and asked if I was still unemployed.  I said, “gratefully yes”.  And before I could explain what I meant – that God was taking care of me, and I was learning to be grateful in ALL circumstances – his wife retorted “Well, you must not be REALLY unemployed!”  And she spoke from some experience, because they are currently experiencing unemployment as well.

My first response was, really?? although I did not say that out loud.  But I thought Is Robert and mine’s unemployment less upsetting and frustrating because it’s me, and not him, as in their family? Are our bills any less paid than theirs, and does it really even matter?  The hunt for a job is the same, whether you made $40,000 a year or $12,000….it’s still a hunt.  And it is still aggravating and unnerving all the same.

Later that day, as I was still mulling this over, I realized it was not the issue of no job that was bothering me, it was the comparison!  I was reminded of when my Dad died, and my sister and I quickly tired of the comparisons to other people’s grief..”at least he didn’t suffer” or “at least you had him for a long time”.  Equally not true and not helpful.

God made each of us differently, with different talents, abilities, and most importantly, different losses and suffering, and different reactions to those!  Just because I am not sulking, or having a pity party, or having more than anyone in a situation, does not mean that I don’t feel.  I am being positive about this experience as much as possible, because that’s the way God made me and that’s where I am spiritually.  When a huge flash of lightening and thunder occurred at church last night, several adults in our Bible study were afraid, while others were not.  That’s just the way God made us.

So if you and I react differently to hardship, great!  My “and yet!” God is working on behalf of all His children, and I believe He would much prefer us to follow this verse: “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15).  I want to make that my goal!

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