I heard an amazing statement on the radio the other day, and it struck me so much that this post is a result. “God is writing your story..so stop trying to steal the pen!”  Well, wow! I have never thought about God’s direction and work in my life in quite those terms.  However, after the last month of losing a family member to Parkinson’s and a great friend to cancer, it makes a LOT of sense.  Let me explain:

If I were writing my life story, it would look nothing like what my 58 plus years actually have been.  And I bet neither would yours.  Mine would have gone something like this:  “Beth was one of the most beautiful and fair babies, who grew from childhood into a petite and lovely young woman, with long flowing blonde hair.  She sailed through school, mastered a college degree, all while meeting her perfect match and marrying after college.  As her life progressed her family grew, her children were almost perfect, money was never an issue, and no one had yet to get sick or die.  She was loved by all, and able to achieve her goals at abnormal speed.  She was fluent in three languages, and capable in seven different ministries in her church….”

Are you cracking up yet??  Me too! Because the REAL life of Beth is NOTHING like that, lol! I have had some victories and triumphs, true…and I have married my perfect match and am madly in love with him still.  But that’s about where the comparison ends!  And I know I am not alone.  Which is what this statement says so profoundly:  I am NOT authoring my story.  Absolutely not.  I have NEVER written one chapter, one paragraph, not even one sentence.  GOD has been the creator, producer, director, choreographer, and final authority over this life.  And why do I know this is true?  Keep reading.

If the pen were in my hand, there are lots of things I would never have written.  I would not have included being average looking and a nerd, with great test scores but no popularity in school.  I would not have included NOT attending college until I was 40, or some of the awful minimum wage jobs I endured to gain experience in the office work world.  I would not have written in that my perfect match would be divorced with two children, and that I would never have my own biological children…I would not have been able to see how that could EVER be the perfect fit for me, but it was…over and over and over again.  I would not have written of imperfect churches, imperfect people, and frustration in ministry.  I certainly would not have written in the deaths of grandparents, friends, and other family members.  I would not have put in the death of my father at age 66 fifteen years ago, or the death of Robert’s sister and niece within 7 months of each other last year.  All of these, and countless others, are things that I would have considered detrimental and horrible and unnecessary, and I would have been wrong.

AND YET!  I ALSO would not have put in a lot of my blessings!  I would not have known how amazing my love for my husband and my stepchildren and their children could EVER have fulfilled my life the way they have.  I wouldn’t have known the joy of victory and accomplishment in ministry, because I would never have put the failures in there.  I wouldn’t have also probably ever believed that God would use me to teach a Sunday School class, much less go to Nigeria on a mission trip…because I wouldn’t have seen His faithfulness in growing me through rejection and hardship and discipleship.  I would have missed SO many important truths learned through failure…and trying again..and more failure…and finally getting it right.  I wouldn’t for sure have put the people in my life that have aggravated me, humiliated or taunted me, rubbed me wrong and been just plain ornery…because I would not know the value of those people in making me patient and gracious and sometimes loving!

So that’s the point of this blog, and the saying I opened it with.  We cannot write our stories like God can, because we are not HIM.  We are not all knowing, all seeing, and all powerful.  We barely have plans for today, much less plans for our whole lives, and how they mesh with the lives of others.  We are NOT capable.  And therefore, STOP.  Really, just stop.  Stop trying to grab the pen, and just trust the Author.  Amen!