discouragment

June 31st

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When I worked for the bank, in the electronic banking support department, one of the most interesting parts of my job was reading the “contact us” email.  There were emails that make perfect sense, well worded, and straight to the point.  There were also emails that threatened, whined and complained…and I was supposed to come up with some reasonable answer to all of them.

However, there were some that were just downright hilarious, and were amazing in what they said.  One of my favorite ones was a sweet, sincere note..asking for help with their online statement.  It seems they had downloaded the statement, but they felt it was incomplete.  The email basically read “I am having problems with my statement.  When I download it I only get June 1-30 – and I can’t figure out why you cut off the 31st!”. Ok, if you haven’t caught on, June only has 30 days!  And I very politely replied to that effect.  But now when I have one of those days, just the thought “June 31st” can make the worst moment very bearable.

I believe God allows days like that for a very specific purpose.  One is to get us to quit taking ourselves and our immediate “worlds” so seriously…to get us to step back and say, “Really? Am I so worked up about this?”  God does want His children to laugh, and smile, and enjoy their lives…and we need to act like we have unending joy and peace in our lives.

Another reason is to make us humble.  We can be very impressed with ourselves sometimes, and we forget that we are just one step, one thought, one moment in the wrong cirumstances to start downhill towards some very ugly attitudes and habits!  And we just really DON’T impress anyone when we have a judgmental attitude.

And finally, I believe God gives us those days to say, “Look – I am in charge here, if you will just let me work.  And since you won’t always, I have to make you weak so that I can be strong.  In your weakness I shine…so here’s __________to help remind you whose power you need to be walking in!”

So, when a June 31st day happens to you, or maybe a June 31st week, stop.  And look around.  And pray. And ask God what He needs to do through you, or show you, that you aren’t picking up on.  And above all, LAUGH!  To Him be all the glory as we pursue this life as His children!

Shining in the Dark

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DSCN0198I was very blessed to get this picture last fall when I was driving home from church one night.  I love the light breaking through the darkness, refusing to be swallowed up, and shining on.

I always think of this Scripture “Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your Father which is in Heaven.”  (Matthew 5:16). Our world today in general is a very dark place.  It seems every day that there is new wickedness, new brutality, and new evidence of man’s fallen state, and very little of the victory of God and His people.  It is so easy to watch a 30 minute nightly news cast, and think, “what’s the purpose?”  And sad to say, this is very true of Christians as well.  I have heard this more lately than not, “even so, Lord Jesus, come!”  Or “I am SO ready for the Lord to come back and take us home!”  As if there are no more victories to be had, no more sinners to be saved,and no more good to be done on Earth.

AND YET!!  Our God says that WE have the victory, and we are more than overcomers, and WE are the ones He has chosen to use to penetrate the darkness of this world! What gives us the right to give up, if we have the most powerful source in the world – the Lord – working on our behalf??

Look at this picture again.  What is the predominant color?  Black/dark gray.  But what is the color you notice first?  The light!  And why is the light so striking?  Because it’s surrounded by dark!  That’s the way God’s people – you and me – need to be especially now.  We need to look the darkness in the face, and say, “You will not drown out my light – in fact, you will just emphasize it!  We need to remember that God expects us to share that light, and work to bring as many people as possible to Him – because the Scripture also reminds us that He is not willing that any should perish, and that His longsuffering towards us is because He wants to give as many as possible an opportunity to know Him.

So, the next time you notice you are surrounded by darkness, remember – that’s your time, and God’s, to really show off His love and let others see Jesus in you!  Remember – we have the rest of eternity to live in His light – so what’s a little darkness now?

That’s How We Roll!

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unnamed[1] (17)This picture is of my favorite, favorite little guy, Anderson.  He is one of the best “and yet..God!” stories of my life.  His parents, Jamie & Candon, came to know the Lord late – after 12 years of living together, and two children ages 11 & 10 at the time.  After their salvation, they wanted to honor the Lord in all things, and they got married in July, 2012.  They had been told much earlier that they could never have any more children…..AND YET!!  Two months after the wedding, Candon was pregnant. This little guy was the glorious result, and after the shock wore off, they realized that God indeed blessed them with this miracle in response to their obedience. Anderson will be 2 next month, and although he has outgrown being my worship buddy in “big” church, he is still all mine on Sundays.

Candon sent me this picture the other day, telling me “this is how we roll at age 2!”  As you can see he  is watching TV, all snuggled up, pillow behind his head, favorite stuffed animal by his side, favorite blanket at his feet, and there’s a juice cup in there somewhere.  All the comforts of his life, and his Mom on standby if he needs anything else!  And that confident look on his face indicates he is seriously pleased with life and he has no worries.

Wouldn’t it be great if we lived our lives that way?  Not that God has promised us all the comforts of life.  To the contrary, He has promised us that there will be trials and suffering, and believing in Him will GUARANTEE that we will be hated and persecuted by the world, because they hated HIM.

But we can live victoriously!  We know, as they say, how it all turns out, and it all works out for good for those that love Him (Romans 8:28) that in all things we conquer (Romans 8:37), and that NOTHING can separate us from the love of Christ (Romans 8:38-39)!  So, while we can’t climb into laundry baskets anymore and expect to be waited on hand and foot, we can still adopt my little guy’s confident smile, and KNOW that we will be taken care of, and we win in the end!  Amen!

Still unemployed??

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unnamed[1] (14)This picture cracked me up when I saw it the other day, and I knew it belonged in a blog – and today seems appropriate!  It is a picture of baby owls, and can I ever relate to how they look!  A little frazzled, a little confused, and precariously perched out on a limb.

Exactly one month ago today, at 4:45 pm, I entered into the world of unemployment.  And I have to say – I was SO naive.  I thought that surely by now I would be happily at work in another position, learning new stuff, meeting new friends, and making money.  And, of course, I am not!

Asking people for advice/comments/input when you are unemployed is a lot like calling the IRS for help.  You can call 15 times, and get 15 different answers to ONE tax question!  Same with this.  It is amazing and also kinda sad and hilarious all at the same time.  “Keep your chin up”.  “I heard about this great new job at (fill in the blank) and have you been to see them?”  “Have you gone for job counseling yet?”  “Did you get professional help with your resume?” And on it goes. Now many people telling me this are genuine friends, sincere in their desire to help, and I appreciate all of them.  But if I were to follow it all I would either wind up as President of a major corporation or in jail after strangling the next person that offered advice!

AND YET!  The God who created these adorable creatures also created them to grow up into majestic, soaring birds, who have become forever immortalized in the saying “wise as an owl”.  And the Bible tells me that he knows them all, feeds them, and knows when one of them falls (Matthew 6:26)!  And as the end of that verse says, how much more does He care for me?

So, watch out world!  This cute and fuzzy ball of unemployed me is about to grow up, take off, and soar like a, well, owl!  And it will all be on the wind and wings provided by my “and yet!” God!  To Him be the glory, forever!

Denied, but NOT Defeated!

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DSCN0113Okay, so today the score is unemployment 2, me 0.  Or so it appears.  I got my denial letter today for my unemployment benefits,and if you’ve never had the pleasure of getting one of those, it is NOT an ego booster.  At all.  It is rather a reminder of all that you don’t have now (paycheck) and why you don’t have it!  And it seems on that paper that it also says, “by the way, no one cares”.  It doesn’t really, but that is how it can feel.

I also got the news today that the job that I interviewed for on Monday was offered to someone else.  Sigh.  It was one that I was really interested in, somewhere I have always wanted to work and something I have always wanted to do. It was not, however, in God’s plan for me. So, I took myself to the Dept. of Labor and filled out appeal paperwork for the denial, and turned in yet another application at another company, and will buy another Sunday paper and hope for an ad.

AND YET!  God continues to pour out his blessings.  We received our income tax money today and I also received the money from my 401K – which turned out to be MUCH more than I thought (I had not looked at my last statement apparently).  He continues to show me that He will fulfill His promise in Matthew 6:28-29 “Observe how the lilies of the field grow, they do not toil nor do they spin, yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory did not clothe himself like one of these.”

SO!  I am still loved and cared for by my amazing Lord, and He has not forgotten me.  And He has a plan to provide for me until I go home to be with Him.  Take that, unemployment, and turn that score around to unemployment 2, and me 1 very big God!

No Comparisons Please!

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I had a most interesting conversation with someone this week.  A friend’s husband hugged me, and asked if I was still unemployed.  I said, “gratefully yes”.  And before I could explain what I meant – that God was taking care of me, and I was learning to be grateful in ALL circumstances – his wife retorted “Well, you must not be REALLY unemployed!”  And she spoke from some experience, because they are currently experiencing unemployment as well.

My first response was, really?? although I did not say that out loud.  But I thought Is Robert and mine’s unemployment less upsetting and frustrating because it’s me, and not him, as in their family? Are our bills any less paid than theirs, and does it really even matter?  The hunt for a job is the same, whether you made $40,000 a year or $12,000….it’s still a hunt.  And it is still aggravating and unnerving all the same.

Later that day, as I was still mulling this over, I realized it was not the issue of no job that was bothering me, it was the comparison!  I was reminded of when my Dad died, and my sister and I quickly tired of the comparisons to other people’s grief..”at least he didn’t suffer” or “at least you had him for a long time”.  Equally not true and not helpful.

God made each of us differently, with different talents, abilities, and most importantly, different losses and suffering, and different reactions to those!  Just because I am not sulking, or having a pity party, or having more than anyone in a situation, does not mean that I don’t feel.  I am being positive about this experience as much as possible, because that’s the way God made me and that’s where I am spiritually.  When a huge flash of lightening and thunder occurred at church last night, several adults in our Bible study were afraid, while others were not.  That’s just the way God made us.

So if you and I react differently to hardship, great!  My “and yet!” God is working on behalf of all His children, and I believe He would much prefer us to follow this verse: “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15).  I want to make that my goal!

The blessing of “no”

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I do not handle rejection well.  As a matter of fact for a lot of my life, I was a nonstop people pleaser, all because of a deep seated fear of being rejected.  And the word “no” was on my hit list too…I related it to rejection and hearing it was always a source of discouragement for me.

However, with the Lord’s help, I have gotten much better in recent years with accepting that word, and not taking it as personally.  In fact I have learned that “no” is really God’s way of protecting me in a lot of circumstances.  But sometimes He doesn’t just have to shut a door for me, he has to close it AND lock it, and that’s where “no” comes in!

So as I fill out applications, print out and mail resumes, make phone calls, and have interviews in an effort to find my next position, I am experiencing a lot of “no”.  As in no response, no thank you, and no, that position has been filled.  And it is not really any easier to hear than it used to be.  What IS easier is that I am making every effort to keep in mind that God is the one in control, and that He already knows not only my eternal future, but my immediate future.  Every “no” means its not right for me, and He is already providing a new position for me where I can serve, be productive, and learn and grow.

Until then, I will rest and let my “and yet!” God work on my behalf, and I will trust that when the “yes” finally comes, it will be the perfect answer.  To God be the glory!